Tuesday, August 22, 2006

still no F-ing cable OR internet

The cable guy was supposed to hook up cable and high speed internet for me yesterday. After an hour of using his handheld-cable-searching device and searching for the cable box, he determined that he was not able to find a "cable connection" and therefore needed to send a "Community Developer, aka CD technician" to come out and finish the job for us. The first available time is this Friday.

I have to wait until FRIDAY for real cable and internet? WTF? Arguing with the technician showed no progress so I called up customer service at Time Warner cable and had the following conversation:

Me: You sent a technician to hook up cable service and he said he couldn't do it today. Why?

Customer Service Rep: Please hold while I try to find out that information.

Me: Okay. Thanks.

CSR: [Q-pig]? Thank you for holding and being patient with us. The technician today was not able to do the cable service you were asking for. That's why we need to send another technician out there.

Me: Why did you send me a technician who didn't know what he was doing?

CSR: Hold on one moment, please.

Me: okay, thanks.

CSR: Q-pig, thank you for holding and for being patient. The technician who came to your apartment today was not qualified to do cable hookup in an apartment unit.

Me: You're telling me that today's technician was unqualified to hook up cable in an apartment?

CSR: Yes.

Me: Um, you guys knew that I lived in an apartment complex when I decided to sign up for service.

CSR: Yes, we did.

Me: So why did you send me someone who was unqualified technician to do the job?

CSR: Hold on one moment, please.

Me: fine.

CSR: Q-pig, thank you for holding and for being patient. There was a complex situation with the cable box at your apartment complex and we need to send a qualified CD technician out there to fix the problem.

Me: Let me get this straight, you initially sent me an "unqualified" technician to try to hook up my cable.

CSR: Yes.

Me: And now you're going to schedule a time for a "qualified" technician to hook up the cable?

CSR: Yes.

Me: Why are you hiring unqualified people in the first place?

CSR: ..um...um...um

Me: Do you always hire unqualified people and send them out just to have someone else go back in and finish it because the unqualified person doesn't know how to do it in the first place? You know this wastes a lot of my time....

CSR: Miss...

Me: ....and I don't have the time to sit at home for 3 hours at a time waiting for someone to come by and just turn on the cable so I can watch real tv instead of the crap that I have been forced to endure watching over the last three weeks...

CSR: We're terribly sorry...but ....umm....

Me: ...and I really don't care about the cable but the INTERNET. I NEED THE INTERNET and I shouldn't be forced to have a delayed satisfaction of having high speed internet when it is your fault that you hire and send unqualified people out to just turn on the freaking cable.

CSR: I'm terribly sorry. I'll take off $20 off your first bill.

Me: It better be free if the qualified technician doesn't complete the whole process of turning on my cable and installing high speed internet.

CSR: Yes, yes, whatever you want. Just get off the phone.

Okay, the CSR didn't really say that last line but I swear she wanted to.

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